For Clergy, Parishes
& Dioceses
Guiding Couples
for the Vocation of Christian Marriage
The Church entrusts pastors and dioceses with the responsibility of forming couples for the vocation of Christian marriage, not only for the wedding day, but for a lifetime of married life.
For Better & For Ever® and the Sponsor Couple® team approach provides a practical, parish-based way to fulfill this responsibility in alignment with Canon Law, Church teaching, and contemporary pastoral realities.
Canon Law and the Responsibility of Pastoral Care Teams
Canon Law (Canons 1063–1064) makes clear that marriage preparation and marriage enrichment are ordinary responsibilities of the parish and diocese, not optional programs. Pastors are obliged to ensure that the faithful receive:
- Ongoing catechesis on Christian marriage
- Personal preparation for those entering marriage
- A reverent and meaningful celebration of the sacrament
- Continued pastoral care for married couples, especially in the early years
Marriage preparation is explicitly understood as a lifelong process, encompassing remote, proximate, and immediate preparation, as well as post-marriage accompaniment.
A Catechumenate
Model for Marriage
Recent Church documents describe marriage preparation as a “catechumenal pathway,” a process of formation similar to adult initiation into the Church.
This approach recognizes that:
- Many couples did not grow up witnessing a healthy Christian marriage
- Cultural assumptions often conflict with lifelong commitment
- Skills for marriage must be learned and practiced
For Better & For Ever® was developed specifically to support this catechumenal model by integrating formation, dialogue, accompaniment, and follow-up within parish life.
The Role of the Parish
Marriage preparation is most effective when it is rooted in the parish, rather than outsourced to occasional programs.
In the parish-based model:
- Couples are known personally, not processed anonymously
- Married couples serve as witnesses
- Preparation extends beyond the wedding day
- Newly married couples are integrated into parish life
Parishes using the Sponsor Couple® approach report stronger marriages, deeper parish engagement, and renewed vitality among married parishioners.
Sponsor Couple® Ministry:
A Parish Resource
Sponsor Couple® ministry trains married couples of the parish to accompany engaged couples through a structured process of dialogue and reflection.
A Sponsor Couple team serves as a companion to engaged couples, offering:
This approach reflects the Church’s long-standing understanding of sponsorship in sacramental life: accompaniment, witness, and ongoing support, not instruction alone.
Diocesan Oversight and Support
While the Sponsor Couple® ministry serves at the parish level, diocesan oversight ensures consistency, accountability, and sustainability.
Effective diocesan support includes:
- Maintaining a diocesan roster of each Sponsor Couple®
- Providing free training opportunities (now available via Zoom)
- Offering ongoing formation and resources
- Receiving periodic reports on program implementation
This structure allows parishes to remain pastorally flexible while maintaining diocesan coherence.
Preparation Includes
Follow-Up After the Wedding
Canon Law explicitly includes post-marriage pastoral care as part of marriage preparation. The first years of marriage are a particularly vulnerable period. Follow-up accompaniment:
- Helps couples integrate what they learned
- Encourages habits of dialogue and prayer
- Reduces isolation in early marriage
- Strengthens long-term marital stability
A Sponsor Couple® continues informal, appropriate contact with newly married couples during this critical period.
Why This Matters for the Church
Strong marriages are foundational to:
- Family life
- Faith transmission
- Parish vitality
- Vocational discernment
Research consistently shows that the decline of marriage directly contributes to declining faith practice. Addressing marriage formation is not a secondary ministry. It is one of the Church’s most urgent pastoral needs.
An Invitation to Pastors and Dioceses
For Better & For Ever® offers a proven, pastorally sound approach to marriage formation that:
- Aligns with Canon Law
- Engages married couples in meaningful ministry
- Strengthens parish life
- Supports couples before and after the wedding
Clergy are not asked to do more, but to approach marriage preparation differently, with the support of their parish community.
